What's For Dinner, Batman

A friend of mine sent me this joke by email, and it struck such a nerve that I just had to share it with the world! It's a joke, but it could very well be a true story. I've heard stranger things that were true.

I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends.
One is engaged, one is a mistress, and I have been
married for 20+ years.

We were chatting about our relationships and decided
to amaze our men by greeting them at the door
wearing a black bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes.
We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes.

Here's how it all went.

My engaged friend :
The other night when my boyfriend came over he
found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask.
He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams.
I love you.' Then we made passionate love all nightlong.


The mistress:
Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was
wearing a raincoat, under it only the black bra, heels and
mask over my eyes. When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but he started to tremble and we had wild sex all night.


Then I had to share my story:
When my husband came home I was wearing the black bra,
Black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes.
When he saw he just said

"What's for dinner Batman?"


My Personal Observations About Marriage

I have come to the conclusion that life is a series of trade-offs. You trade the wild tantalizing sex you have as an unmarried single gal to get married - some trade it for a home, for children - some for stability and financial security. Now the mistake that women make is being "romantic" about getting married. The romance ends with the long white dress and the walk down that aisle. I think this is because men and women are (1) wired differently, and their fantasies are not inspired by the same things as ours, and (2) men just get married for totally different reasons than women. Women think they will get the whole enchilada - the good sex always at their beck and call along with the security of marriage. They long to live with their "lover" and have him close to them. Men, however, fool around as long as they can before making that commitment - we call it commitment phobic - but I don't think they are as phobic as one might think. I think they are just not ready to bring the dating to a conclusion.

We see dating as a kind of inconvenience, and they see it as "hunting." It's kind of exciting to pursue your woman and have her "yield" to your charms. Without the word "marriage" there, the yielding is spontaneous, and the sex is desired - that's how men see it. I think that once marriage becomes a reality that they view sex as
a "duty" or part of the marriage vows. Maybe women see it that way too in a lot of cases. But, that's my theory about why romance and sex go out the window once you get married. I think men get married when they're ready to give it all up - throw in the towel and take to the recliner with a remote in hand. They've hunted,
they've conquered, now they are tired and want some rest. Meanwhile we are coming up with schemes like black bras and batman masks, and all the men want is dinner and a good bed to SLEEP in.

So, how do we reconcile all these inconsistencies and reach a place where we both have the same expectations? I don't know - I'm still trying to figure it out.

I have never felt more confronted with the "life is a series of tradeoffs" theory than when I lost my son in a tragic accident. All these years I have had people tell me how wonderful my life is, what a great husband I have, how fortunate I am
to be able to travel, what a nice home I have. And yes, I am fortunate in that way, but to me it all seems like a tradeoff because I can't truly be happy or appreciate these things because I miss my son so much, and my heart is so hurt from losing him. I don't even feel close to "well off" because my most precious treasure is
missing.



This video is pretty much from the man's point of view. It's about what women want from men. Nevertheless, it is very funny, and there is a lot of truth in these words that we laugh at, but think about it - isn't there a lot of truth in what he is saying? Are we unreasonable in our expectations sometimes? Are we contradictory in what we want and expect?
© Faye Combs